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Becoming a Resilient Woman as a powerful way of healing

Rolien Scheepbouwer, coach, 57 y.o. Amsterdam

True story of a single mom, who has a daughter with chronic illness.
She helps other mothers overcome burnout and teaches them how to feel calm.
"I do not lack anything after 50.
I have only gained wisdom
and strength."
Rolien told the Aesthetics of Age her story, of how she had been struggling for her child's health and finally won.

Here is her story.

I'm a single mom of a daughter, 27, and a American Bulldog named Blue.
I had always raised my daughter by myself and had a business as a personal trainer, nutritionist, coach, and author when she got very sick.
From the age of 15 years old, she lay in her dark bedroom for ten years straight because she could not handle any noise or light. She had all types of neurological symptoms, and nobody knew what was wrong with her. This was very hard for her, as you can imagine because she was in a lot of pain, and no medication helped her. We saw at least 150 specialists in 10 different hospitals, but nobody knew what caused her to be so severely ill.
At one point, I had to stop working because I was taking care of her all day and night. She had already tried to commit suicide, and when I realized I had gotten burnout, I decided to stop with my business and purely focus on her.
I started a Foundation to raise money for tests, travel, and treatment abroad, and we went to Germany and Spain, where she was successfully treated for Lyme disease. After that, we found out she was born with two rare conditions that had caused another scarce one in her neck.
About 1,5 years ago, she had surgery in the US by one of the world's best neurosurgeons and is doing a lot better now.
She is still recovering but can walk and take care of herself.
Because I am slowly getting my life back, too, I decided to do something with all my experiences of the past 15 years and combine it with my professional knowledge to help other mothers in the same situation as I am, taking care of a chronically ill child.

— Rolien, what are you doing? Please, tell us about your occupation.

— I am the owner of 'Becoming a Resilient Woman'. On this online coaching platform, I help
mothers taking care of chronically ill children overcome burnout and teach them how to feel calm and in control so that they can live a happy and healthy life.

— Wow! You are doing a real noble thing! Do you have time for your own hobbies?

— Yes! I do sports, and enjoy travelling. I also like dancing, art, reading and writing, and of course (re)decorating my house.

— You look wonderful! What is your secret to staying young?

— I do not have a secret for staying young. I live my life like I have always lived it. I exercise 5 times a week with heavy weights. I used to kick- and thaibox but due to my situation at home
had to give that up. I do breathing exercises. I'm a vegan, do not drink any alcohol or coffee, do not smoke or use drugs, and try to sleep 8 hours a night. I also go outside into nature as much as possible. And I do intermittent fasting!

— Rolien, how do you see the ageism situation in the world?

— I do not have an opinion about ageism in the world. I focus on myself and what others do
or think does not bother me.

— I see. And how do you feel about greying hair and natural ageing?

— I love grey hair, but unfortunately I do not get grey. Because I am a natural blond, my hair does not turn grey. Wish it did though.
Natural ageing can be very beautiful if you take good care of yourself. I do not like my wrinkles because I do not feel like an 'older' person. But I hate injections and my fear for them is bigger than my not liking my wrinkles.

— Who is your ageing celebrity role model? Let me know.

— I am not into celebrities but I like Maye Musk a lot. Not only for the way she looks but also for her personality. And Jane Fonda, although she had a lot of work done.

— In your opinion, what women lack after 50?

— I do not lack anything after 50. I have only gained wisdom and strength.

— Rolien, how did you accept your age?

— Never think about my age. Never have, never will. It's not an issue. Still feel the same as 30 years ago. If you focus on your age you will feel old. It's just a number.

— Are there any benefits of getting older?

— The only benefit of getting older is that you become wiser and do not care what others think anymore. Because of all your experiences you understand life and yourself much better. It's less stressfull.

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